If you don't get this joke you have not been following along.In that case you'll need to read Claims of GI Hostage in Iraq Raises Doubt from The Associated Press.
Photo credit to PowerLineBlog.com
Tuesday, February 01, 2005
Another Photo of Captured American
Family Denounces Kuwaiti Terror Suspect
The Associated Press reports that the family of a key terrorist suspect arrested in Kuwait has publicly distanced themselves from him.
Al-Enezi's father, Khlaif al-Enezi, and scores of other relatives signed a statement denouncing him. The statement, published in Kuwaiti newspapers Tuesday, described the suspects as a "gang that lost the way and was lured by the devil."
Now this is the sort of press that the Arab Street has not been interested in garnering. Now that Democracy is on the march in that region, I hope we will see more pronouncements like this.
Dems Call for Applause-Free State of Union Speech
by Scott Ott
(2005-02-01) -- Due to the "somber mood of the nation," Democrats in Congress have called on their Republican colleagues to refrain from all celebratory applause during President George Bush's state of the union speech Wednesday night.
The annual presidential address before a joint session of Congress is traditionally interrupted dozens of times by applause from both parties and frequent cheers and standing ovations from the party in power.
"How can anyone applaud in a time like this?" said Rep. Nancy Pelosi, D-CA, before launching into a list of reasons why Americans are in mourning.
-- "Iraq is a quagmire of Sunni disenfranchisement, and our own citizens in Ohio still lack full voting rights.
-- All of America's beloved manufacturing jobs have been outsourced to China and all the garment-sewing and tech-support jobs to India.
-- The only union labor left on our shores is done in the public schools, where teachers suffer the assaults of wild-eyed heretics trying to undermine Darwinian orthodoxy.
-- Across our land illegal aliens still lack proper health insurance and suffer daily indignities in the name of so-called homeland security.
-- The elderly face a terrifying future when the federal government no longer controls all of their retirement money.
-- Our 14-year-old girls live in fear that they may need parental permission to abort their unwanted fetuses.
-- Our homosexuals still can't marry, forcing them into deadly liaisons with multiple partners.
-- The wealthiest Americans continue to waste money on investments and consumer goods while Congress struggles to make ends meet.
-- And the Supreme Court itself faces the threat of perhaps several new justices who will be too lazy to rewrite our out-dated Constitution."
The House Minority Leader recalled "the halcyon days of the Clinton administration, when clapping and whooping were entirely appropriate."
"Now," she added, "is the winter of our discontent. Please, hold your applause."
In related news, the Democrat National Committee announced that its televised response to the president's speech will be sponsored by Eli Lilly, the makers of Prozac.
Iraqi Voting Disrupts News Reports of Bombings
Pilfered from Sgt. Missick - A Line in the Sand
As written by ScrappleFace
(2005-01-30) -- News reports of terrorist bombings in Iraq were marred Sunday by shocking graphic images of Iraqi "insurgents" voting by the millions in their first free democratic election.
Despite reporters' hopes that a well-orchestrated barrage of mortar attacks and suicide bombings would put down the so-called 'freedom insurgency', hastily-formed battalions of rebels swarmed polling places to cast their ballots -- shattering the status quo and striking fear into the hearts of the leaders of the existing terror regime.
Hopes for a return to the stability of tyranny waned as rank upon rank of Iraqi men and women filed out of precinct stations, each armed with the distinctive mark of the new freedom guerrillas -- an ink-stained index finger, which one former Ba'athist called "the evidence of their betrayal of 50 years of Iraqi tradition."
Journalists struggled to put a positive spin on the day's events, but the video images of tyranny's traitors choosing a future of freedom overwhelmed the official story of bloodshed and mayhem.
Think Hillary Won't Make a Run In 2008?
Then you have obviously not seen her most recent remarks!
As captured by NewsMax.com:
Tuesday, Feb. 1, 2005 12:31 a.m. EST
Hillary Praises Iraq Elections
While top Democrats continue to downplay the impact of the historic Iraq elections on Sunday, New York Senator Hillary Clinton has taken an early step to set herself apart from the naysayers.
In a statement posted to her Web site two days before the vote's smashing success, Clinton said: "No matter what you think about the Iraq war, there is one thing we can all agree on for the next days. We have to salute the courage and bravery of those who are risking their lives to vote and those brave Iraqi and American soldiers fighting to protect their right to vote."
They are facing terrorists who have declared war on democracy itself and made voting a life-and-death process," the 2008 presidential contender declared. "We hope this vote succeeds and pray for a safe election day."
Though neither Clinton nor her husband has commented since throngs of Iraqis turned out to vote, her statement stands in marked contrast to comments by Sen. John Kerry, a likely rival in 2008, as well as other top Democrats.
On Sunday Kerry dismissed the vote, questioning its legitimacy and warning the White House not to "overhype" its significance.
The same day Sen. Ted Kennedy repeated his call for a U.S. pullout, suggesting the impact of the Iraq election was limited at best.
What Will Friday's Employment Report Tell Us?
On Friday, we will see how many jobs were added to the economy in January 2005. I am predicting that between 200,000 and 350,000 jobs were added.
With the manufacturing industry still growing and the retail industry also on the rise, the US economy should be humming along at a pretty good pace throughout 2005.
But just as employment lagged in the red-hot economic growth of last year, employment numbers may continue to underperform in 2005.
If at least 200,000 jobs are added in January 2005, then we can continue to expect growth across the entire economy.
The US economy seems to be dragging the world economy along for the ride. Which only reminds me that some world Democracies might be wise to do whatever they can to insure America's economy remains healthy.
